Parents often feel that they are the biggest influence in the life of their child. And therefore, they feel responsible for their child’s development. It is true that you can influence your child directly and that you have a big responsibility in your child’s development. But your influence is not absolute. There are a lot of other people and situations over which you have little control that have a profound influence on your child.

At first, the notion that there is so much over which you have little control may seem scary. But it has been so for just about anybody since the beginning of time. And those children that have been sheltered form the great variety that life has to offer, can never truly be themselves. And isn’t that why we have kids in the first place? To allow them to be all they can be? We do not want to create exact copies of who we are. They must have their own experiences and learn to make up their own minds.

Many child experts believe that the influence of friends on child development is greater than the influence that parents have. Kids have to play with children their own age. How do we know that playing with peers is so important?

There are thousands of things kids have to learn during development. And a lot of them are tied to peers who are learning the same things. So watching peers learn helps a child to gain greater understanding. While it is true that parents are also important role models, it is also true that they are a lot further along their developmental journey. Parents simply cannot teach everything a child needs to know.

Psychiatrist M. J. Cladder states that psychiatric problems are often connected to a lack of friendship with peers during childhood. And not so much with ‘bad parenting’ as we are often led to believe. This is why I believe all kids have to make friends.

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